Dominique Lopez – The story of US!
Couple’s Love Song: Kane Brown (There goes my everything)
Our story does not begin like most, we did not have love at first sight, nor did we have a wave of friends hoping to join the two of us. It was completely opposite. I was hanging on to a lost romance that resulted in an engagement for the sake of the child we were to bring into the world. While my now to be finance was at the end of a long relationship with a girl I went to high school that was battling drug addiction. It began with a string of attempts from Lukus in attempt to get to know me better. Those strings went unanswered for months, as I was not in a state of mind to date after my broken engagement. Finally, in April of 2011 I happen to be checking my email and noticed yet another Facebook conversation bubble had come through. It was apparent that this guy was not going to give up until I had responded. I responded with a simple “Hey” and the conversation lasted over an hour. During this time my responsivities which involved dishes became due. I decided to test the conversation; I knew there was no way he would pass, as most males at this time didn’t. I stated that I had to jump off line and get house chores done but if he wanted to continue speaking he could call me and proceeded to provide my phone. Less than 3 minutes went by when a number not saved in my phone had come through. I thought to myself “There is no way that this call could be him.” To my shocking surprise it was him. The phone call lasted all night. In which the conversation finally led to Lukus requesting to take me on a date. I explained that I was in a complicating situation with my daughter’s father and not looking to date at the time. While he understood the situation and respected my decision, he did not give up.
Over the course of a few weeks I would continue to receive “Good morning beautiful” texts as well as songs he had sent to me. The playlist included songs from YouTube, most I had not even heard of. The songs he found and sent to me were “You deserve better” by Kid Twist and “I should be your man” by Lil Crazed. Some how he had managed to simply dedicate a song that engraved every doubt and lost feeling that I had gone threw with my ex fiancé. At that point I had decided to accept that date all though he was completely opposite of what my type at the time. I had agreed to a date, however, had my stipulations which would include driving myself or picking up while attending somewhere public and well lit. After all this was basically a blind date and you can never be to safe. I had made plans with Lukus to pick up from his house on a Friday night and drive to Dave and Busters. When I arrived I had no idea what to expect? After he entered the car an awkward silence fell as he stared out the window. I knew I had to break the silence. The corniest yet straight forward statement had flown at of my mouth with no warning “Are you that nervous where you can not even look at me?” He must not of minded as I was able to get a laugh and the atmosphere seemed more relaxed. The date went great! We had dinner, drinks and had a fantastic time with the games. As the night came to an end, we proceeded to the door to leave. As we were walking, and I approached the driver door, a hand grabbed mine and I stopped in my tracks. Lukus pulled me near and asked for my permission to kiss me. This had never happened to me up until this point in my life and I melted. Although I declined his request, the fact that he had asked rather than just going for it stayed with me the whole way home.
After the initial date I found myself spending more and more time with him. Usually weekends as this was the times that my daughter spent with her father he had visitation with his two children. We continued to spend every moment either with each other or texting threw out the day. Now, in every love story there is that unforeseeable event that occurs to keep the two apart. Well our story is no different. About 4 months into our relationship everything had changed. We had awoken to his son being at his mother’s house with no warning. When Lukus attempted to reach his sons mother, there was no answer. Days had gone by and there was still no explanation or plan for his son. His son arrived with nothing more than the clothes on his back at the age of 3. I had a decision to make: 1) Do I leave and not return as this is not my battle or 2) Do I stand by this remarkable man and help where I can? After we discovered that his mother would not be back for their son; I had made the decision to stay and offer my help where possible. So here we are a new couple enjoying our time to now trying to compensate for a missing parent. His son had a hard adjusting and had developed abandonment issues, so bad to the point that neither his dad nor I could leave to the store or work for that matter with out a screaming episode developing that would later cause us to seek help from a child therapist. Now I know what you’re thinking, what are you doing it’s a new relationship with major complications and at the time I had just turned 22 years old. I was biting off more than I could chew. At least this is the way my family and peers saw it. They told me to walk away and never look back. This was not my battle to fight.
Despite the chatter and comments, I chose to say. I saw this man that adored me and treated me the way I was supposed to be treated and I saw this little boy that at no fault of his own was lost. I wish I could tell you that things got better, and we lived happily ever after, that’s not the case nor the end of our story. The hard times continue to pound us like the ragging ocean waves. During the next year and half, we dealt with my now boyfriend and his son losing there housing, due to his mother moving in with her in laws. For about a month my boyfriend and his son lived in a motel, he had no job and no vehicle as transportation. I think it’s safe to say that our relationship had hit a rock bottom with all the stress and uncertainty. I was on my own to make things work and pick us back up. I was working full time in Boulder, Co and was paying off my current car. I payed their motel rental every two weeks with my pay check with some help from an aunt and uncle of his. After a long month of them being border line homeless we were finally able to get our own place. We were lucky enough to find an amazing woman to rent us her 2-bedroom condo in Thornton, Co. We were both working, had saved for a car for Lukus and were able to place his son in daycare during our working hours. We were well on our way to a better future.
If you don’t recall at the being of this story I had explained that my boyfriend had two children with his ex-girlfriend. We had very little contact with his ex-girlfriend and had arranged to have his daughter dropped off with his mother so may have his visitation. This did not last long before, as we made the decision together to take his daughter for the living situation she was in. The mother of his children was not ready to be a mother, she had no housing and was living out of her car, no form of income and it showed when we saw his daughter. So here we are chugging away at life managing work, home duties, a 4-year-old little boy, my weeks with my daughter and now adding another full time 3-year-old to the mix. In this case, after we took his daughter we did not hear from the children’s mother for the next year or so. So now were in the 2nd year of our roller coaster romance! Life was a struggle and we were starting from scratch as we prepared for the next curveball that came our way.
After the two years of our relationship my family and friends still asked for me to break things off, as things were getting more difficult. His children had both finally accepted me and now referred to me as “Mom” as I was that figure for them since they were 3 years old. How could I walk away from that? So, we continued our life and overcoming every obstacle that was designed to tear us down and apart and we seemed to be getting stronger. Finally, around our three-year anniversary my family had accepted and welcomed Lukus and his children to our family. They had finally come to see the man that truly lived behind the struggles and came to love him the way I did.
In March of 2017 we had finally hit our 6 year and anniversary. I know who would of thought! So here we are just a typical weekend, consisting of laundry and every day chores. When Lukus came into our room where I sat folding laundry and had asked me to close my eyes. I continued to hear ripping paper and Styrofoam and a loud gasp that came from my daughter that was helping me with chores. When I was finally allowed to open my eyes, I was presented with an encased rose like the one on Disney’s Beauty and the Beast with an engraving that said, “Will you marry me?” I was beyond ecstatic and could not say YES fast enough. He had explained that he wanted to do it somewhere more romantic, but he thought it was the perfect time so that my daughter could apart of the proposal. He even went as far as asking both my father and my step father for their approval in my hand. In which they both joyfully granted. I could not have pictured a more perfect way then being in our home on a regular day with my daughter by myside.
I immediately started planning and getting everyone involved. I found my dress, picked my theme and found a venue that was in our price range. However, life hit and another curve ball. My brother was admitted to the hospital on life support and all the planning came to an abrupt stop. How could I plan a wedding while watching my brother struggle for life? Finally, after a month a half my brother was able to leave the hospital. However, life had another curve ball coming. My soon to be sister in law had hit hard times and lost her home. So being the people we are we welcomed our 14-year-old nephew to stay with us. So, you can guess where wedding planning fell. That’s right it fell dead last and basically nonexistent. Our special day was originally planned for May 31, 2018 which was on a Thursday due to our financial strain. So here we are February 5, 2018 with no date in site as the venue is no longer available and the even harder financial strain with the challenge of supporting another child. Please help us beat the odds again not only unite Lukus and I but our children as well.